It’s a well known fact in the Low Carb & Keto communities that potatoes are anathema. It is often said that the deleterious effects of consuming potatoes can be far worse for those with insulin sensitivity than putting one’s face down in a bowl of granulated sugar. Supposedly, that’s because the potato’s effects are much longer lasting than sugar, wreaking more metabolic havoc over a longer sustained period of time.
I ran across an article about this recently. As I was reading it, my humor imp started pointing out the similarities between the dangers of consuming contaminated potatoes and the dangers of living with/being around toxic people on a consistent basis. Very intriguing. Take the following for example:
A surprising fact I learned from this article was that more human fatalities have occurred from consuming contaminated potatoes than any other food or food group. With that said, I’ll let you draw your own corollary here about toxic people and their role in emotional fatalities.
Potatoes contain a toxin substance called glycoalkaloids. This chemical is toxic to humans but works well for them as it protects them from their own nasty environment down there in the dirt. This deadly outer coating—the outside skin of the potato, or the fake outward persona of a toxic individual—when ingested by those of us not accustomed to living underground, can create nasty holes in the gut.
Is it any reason why overdose and long term exposure to that crazy boss, those backstabbing coworkers, or any of a number of other wing-nuts you may come in contact on a daily basis can leave you feeling like you have a gaping hole in the gut?
Studies have shown that potatoes also contain another irritating substance called lechtins. Lechtins have the ability to irritate and compromise the entire immune system, resulting in a state of hypersentivity. I found that to be an interesting corollary to living with a toxic individual—always walking on egg shells and coping by being in a persistent state of hypersensitivity and hypervigilance. These hypervigilant states often continue long after the exposure to the toxic offender has ended. I could go on, but suffice it to say that there is an undeniable connection between bad potatoes and bad people in my humorous monkey mind.
The takeaway here is that if you too have experienced the dreaded Potato Bug, you’re in good company. If you’re one of the luck ones and you haven’t experienced it, arm yourself with knowledge. When you first start smelling that stinky potatoes smell in your pantry or you notice those tentacles starting to grow, know this:
The good news is that after a sufficient period of No Contact, your stress levels will self-regulate back to normal. I assure you that—as a human born to live above the ground—once you’ve free of your toxic tuber for a while, you’ll find yourself without that gnawing pain in your gut. And best of all, you’ll be able to live free of that annoying crunching sound from walking on all those eggshells all that time!
So how would you like your potatoes? Boiled? Fried? Me—I prefer mashing them.